It’s raining again, the showers have been steady most of the night. I snuggle underneath my quilt and like clockwork Angus appears. He jumps in along side me snuggling in tight declaring “I’m going to steal the warm spot!”. Oh what a mother must endure. I can hear Mal fixing breakfast for the kids, I’m now in no rush to emerge from my warm spot. He calls out wanting to know what Zara has, he is usually out of the house by the time the kids need feeding.

I’m enjoying my coffee, it’s showering again and the air is cool. The front door squeaks open, it’s Zara heading out with her shoes not on her feet properly. I tell her it’s raining and cold and not to head outside yet. It’s met with the usual and expected amplified scream of disapproval, but she complies. This will be repeated several more times before I bend.

The bellows of disapproval have got the better of me. “Come on Zara get some socks and a coat.”, the rain has eased for the moment. I help her on with her shoes and she darts for the door. I fix another coffee and I hear Angus heading out too. Clancy emerges from his bedroom and asks “Can I read you more of my book?”. Perfect, I’m feeling extremely unmotivated today, so reading ticks a big learning box, and the fact he is asking makes me happy.

It’s been about half an hour and I think I better go see what they are up to. I should have known the puddles would be too great a temptation. There she is standing in the middle of a puddle, but given how wet she is I know it’s not the first. Angus walks across, strangely his boots are wet but not much else. He’s talking non stop, nothing unusual there, he’s telling me about Zara being in the puddles. It’s then Zara slips and now has a muddy butt and hands, we are all laughing and she is saying “yuck” between giggles. She wanders off into a few more puddles but the breeze is picking up so I suggest we head back in for a shower to warm up. Now clean, Zara grabs her dirty clothes from the floor and takes them to the laundry to be washed without being asked, she could teach her brothers a few life skills.

Whilst we were outside Clancy’s teacher has left a message on the answering machine. They are checking in with families and requests I call her back. I will, but later, like I said extremely unmotivated today. I head to Zara’s room to see what she is doing, she is playing with her doll house. I ask her if the figurines are “flying on a magic bed”, she grins with approval and flys the bed around. I suggest a few more scenarios and she acts them out, but she’s done with this game, and grabs out a book. We sit on the floor, I am reading, but this book has puzzle pieces to go with the story, so Zara is completing the puzzles. Book finished she grabs some water paints and heads to the kitchen, time for a little art.

The phone rings, it’s Zara’s teacher doing the check in. I was expecting the call. This conversation is easy, Sonia is an amazing teacher and has become a supportive friend. I tell her we have put the school packs to the side for the moment and we will revisit them again at some point but for now we are winging it. It will be the same message I give Clancy’s teacher later, we haven’t given up on the school packs but for now my stability is important and the strong raw feelings I can still feel simmering just below my surface.

After lunch Mal and Angus head out again to kick the footy. I hear Zara heading off again, the call of the puddles is strong. I’m cleaning up lunch plates when Clancy asks if he can go out too. We grab jumpers and go out to join the others.

Mal is now putting his dog on the Ute, footy has finished. Angus and Zara are a little further on past the Ute and yes, in a puddle. When Clancy and I get there Angus is telling us the “rules” of the puddle, who’s he kidding? Man, this kid talks faster than a drag car, and barely stops to draw breath. He sits down and removes his shoes, apparently this must be a good idea as Clancy and Zara follow suit. Angus is now literally swimming in the puddle, Zara is saturated, but Clancy is conservative and at is barely in up to his ankles but the smile on his face is no less obvious than the others.

Clancy notes that two puddles are next to each other but one puddle feels warmer than the other. I ask him “why do you think that is?”, he shrugs. “Have a guess” I say. “Maybe the sun hit that puddle and not the other one.” “Good guess, very close. I think it’s because one puddle is smaller than the other, they would have both received the same small amount of sunshine today, but the big puddle would need more sunshine to heat the volume of water it holds”. He and Angus are now exploring the temperature of puddles and also discover that the big puddle is warmer at its edges. The science of nature is awesome. The cold breeze is picking up and it’s starting to rain again. I tell them it’s time to come in. To my surprise there are no objections. Back to the bathroom we head.

Showering Angus he turns to me and says “I wish you had of got in the puddles with us, it’s fun!”. I fondly remember the fun of puddles but somewhere along the way they lost their appeal. I truely hope childhood pleasures don’t loose their appeal for my kids for a very long time.

May your childhood memories bring you joy during these uncertain times. See you tomorrow.

Larissa x

So let them be little, cause they’re only that way for a while. Give them hope, give them praise, give them love, every day. Let em cry, let em giggle, let them sleep in the middle. Oh, just let them be little

Songwriters: Billy H. Dean / Richie Mcdonald

It happened like always, the sun rose again today. Angus’s face is only centimetres from mine, I’m barely awake and not a morning person. “Come on mum, I want to show you the pretty sky.” It’s not the first time in his few short years he has said this, but this morning the relevance is not lost on me.

The kids are in no hurry for breakfast, they are happy in their pjs. I seize the opportunity to have two lazy coffees in my pjs. I pick up my phone to send a snap chat to Jodi, we’ve been best friends for forty or so years, she too has always been a safe place for me to fall of cliffs, yesterday was no exception and I want to check in to let her know I’m okay. In that very instant she has beaten me to snap chat and there is her smiling face distorted by a filter, she knows those things make me laugh. The kids are now ready for breakfast.

I’m getting Zara sorted with getting dressed when Clancy comes to show me his list of jobs for his “farm”, it’s all pictures so I encourage him to add words. Angus follow suit and makes a picture list too, he can’t be out done by the big brother after all. Zara is dressed and shoots outside, headed for the chook pen, there is comfort and happiness for her in her own routines.

I wander through the kitchen and notice the one leftover sausage from last night that I had forgotten when I fed Ebby. I grab it and open the back door. There she is waiting for breakfast, no surprise there, Labradors are always waiting for food. I sit scratching her ears whilst watching Zara. I have always found happiness in the company of dogs from a very young age.

I grab the garbage and walk it over to the shed, oh the joys of no kerb side collections. On the way back I head in Zara’s direction. My eye is caught by the tiniest detail hanging from a Kurrajong tree. A live caterpillar is hanging from a single strand of web. He is battling not only to get free but to escape from a red ant trying to eat him. The battle is amazing. I try to capture it on my camera but they are tiny and swinging in the breeze so my attempts are fruitless.

I decided earlier that today I’m not going to open the school packs, if I’m honest my care factor for them is less than ten percent today. I’ve trusted the school teachers and aides to date and have made some amazing friends because of it, I have no reason not to trust they are planning for all levels of progress, or no progress, when this is finished. This does not mean that I haven’t thought about things we can do today.

“Pizza is fun, educational, and yummy for lunch!” I declare to the kids. I know there won’t be any arguments with that, they love making pizza. So I ask “what’s the first step in making pizza?”. Angus jumps in with “put sauce on”, “no” I reply, “make dough” says Clancy, “nope, we wipe the bench” I answer handing Clancy a wet cloth. The boys are excited and are now arguing over who’s turn it is, I wish I could figure out how to get that response with tidying their room.

This is fun, we cover fractions with the measuring cups, teamwork, following instructions, and then I launch into my favourite bit, the science of yeast. I have done this before, so I quiz them. I explain that this dry yeast is like a bear, it’s hibernating and it wants to wake up. When it does it will be hungry for warm sugary drinks, it will eat so much it will get a belly ache, fart and make our dough rise. The kids are watching and giggling at our farting bear yeast, it’s a welcome sound. They finish the pizza production and I request Clancy to draw a diagram of who’s pizza is where on the tray so they don’t get mixed up. Full bellies and it’s time for a decent size break, and coffee.

Onto my next activity. I pull out some painters tape, cardboard tubes, ping pong balls, straws, and a box. I set about putting tape on the floor, it peaks interest and questions on what I’m doing. I ask them to guess, this is purely for my amusement. Clancy thinks I’m making a ninja track, Angus thinks we are painting after I tell him it’s painters tape, and Zara is inspecting the balls.

I tell them it’s a race track. You are not allowed to touch the ball, you have to blow it along with the straw, extra points if you can put the ball through the tubes. All is going great, we are laughing, then we discover the balls don’t fit in the tubes, never mind the game continues. It was such fun the boys want to do it again. I don’t know how educational it is and I don’t care to analyse it, it was fun and that’s what counts.

Angus heads off with Mal, there are sheep to move again today. Clancy tells me he’s bored. I ask him would he like to read his book to me. We have been reading the fabulously funny “Bad guys” by Aaron Blabey, he agrees so we sit and read and laugh together.

I’m calling today a resounding success. Not because we achieved things that resembled anything educational, but because we smiled, we laughed, and nobody had to hide under blankets.

May the sun shine for you tomorrow and may you find joy in simple things.

Larissa x

“Keep your face to the sun and you will never see the shadows.”

Helen Keller